I started painting rainbows yesterday and now there are several rainbow rovings outside drying and several more to come.  Rainbows seem to cheer up a blah day.

This is what I will be making this weekend for the family.  Now if I could only find sugar free icing then I can have some too.

Chocolate Eclair Cake

Box of Graham crackers

Large box French Vanilla Pudding (and required amount of milk as directed)

Small container of whipped topping

Chocolate Icing

Mix pudding as directed on box, fold in whipped topping.

Make multi layers of gramham crackers and pudding mix (ending with graham crackers) in a 13×9 cake pan.  Spread icing on top of graham crackers.  Refrigerate (overnight is best) to let the pudding soften the crackers.  Serve chilled and enjoy.

I played with some fiber combinations yesterday, I played with some different colors, and I played with different ways to card up said fibers.  As a result, I came up with several different things, but this one for some reason called me to spin.  So as I sat spinning “The American Dream”, I happened to look over to my left and I saw the cutest thing.  The eyes that looked up at me were sweet and innocent and begging for attention.  I was able to take this shot:

Aren’t those the cutest little sad eyes you have ever seen?  I mean really, they just beg for attention.  Well, I was a horrible mommy, because I just kept spinning and spinning and spinning (along with dealing with children) and sort of forgot the doggie was right there at my feet.  When I looked over at him again….this is what I saw.

Yup…he gave up on me and crashed out.  Stitches should come out his paw tomorrow and the collar should be able to stay off all the time then.  YAY!

By the way…the spinning you see there is a purplish wool combined with pink silk.  Soooooo soft and it really shines.

Off to dye rainbows today.

A very special thank you to all who wrote me publically and privately regarding yesterdays post about my momma.  I know I shouldn’t feel guilty about putting my children first and I know she understood.  But the feelings are there all the same.  Today is a better day.  I tell you, that song being sent to me at the end of writing the letter was a breath of heaven.

NEW YARN:

In honor of April’s Project Spectrum I introduce to you a new line of our yarns called “spectrum”  It’s a self striping yarn that has solid and variegated stripes.  The first to colorway to be introduced is:

 Spectrum Yourange

We can produce the very intense bright colors seen here or tone down the yellow and orange a bit.  100 grams fingering weight merino wool. 17.00 plus 2.00 shipping

Right now I am only taking special orders to make sure I have enough of this color way.  You can send your requests to order @ wovenspun [dot] com (remove spaces please) or leave a comment on my blog and I will get back with payment arrangements.

NEW RING

I created a new ring.  I know there’s just not enough rings out there already, right?  This one is for our fibery and military communities.  Please feel free to join us at Operation Fiber Force if you love things fibery (knitting, crocheting, spinning, etc) and are a member of the military, dependent, or just have a loved one that’s serving.  Being in the military has it’s own set of challenges and we’d love to have you join us.  See the link on the left side of my page under Rings and Things.

For those of you who tune into my blog, this is not the usual trying to be upbeat post regarding my fiber passion today.  Today’s post is a letter to my momma.  I have been struggling with some real guilt issues since she passed away.  You see, she was so sick when we left KY to move out here.  I really felt she needed me to stay, but since it was the kids first move since their adoption, we had promised them we would move together as a family.  Leaving her was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do.  As I hugged her goodbye I knew it would be the last time I would ever do that.  She was there when I needed her, but I couldn’t be there when she needed me.  I know she understood but it doesn’t help deal with the feeling I let her down.

Dear Momma,

Today is such a sad day for me.  I am in tears even as I try to write this.  Just saying your name is hard.  Looking at your picture is even harder.  The past 6 months have been an eternity, or so it seems, yet just a drop in the bucket.  It’s been 6 months since you left us for a place far better then here.

I can’t seem to find the words to explain why it hurts so much.  I long to hear your voice telling me that everything is going to be ok.  I still reach for the phone nearly everyday around 10:00 to call you and check on you.  How I miss our talks. Oh we fussed and we fought and we didn’t always agree, but that’s what made us a family.

I know you didn’t know what to do with a daughter like me.  Especially one that didn’t want to climb trees and drive race cars like you.  You had no clue (nor the patience) how to learn to knit or any of the fibery stuff that I did.  But you always loved and appreciated anything I made for you.  Going through your things I found some of the very first things I ever made for you.  What a treasure for me to find.  It couldn’t have been easy raising a daughter like me that was so not like you but then again so very much like you in many ways.  I admire you for putting up with me.

There are so many things I long to tell you.  Things like, did you know that Jessi has a front tooth now?  Cass is growing into such a sweet young lady.  Chris has really blossomed and is really starting to mature.  Josh, well Josh is Josh and he’s such a cool kid.  Then there’s Jac…such a cute boy.  And then there’s the not so great stuff I long to share…Caleb, my situation, and Jim not being home much, and the list goes on.  Do you know these things already?

You touched so many lives along your life’s journey and especially after you started your chemo and radiation treatments.  People latched on to your strength and courage and you helped pull them through.  The last thing you told me, momma, was to be the strong one.  Oh how I feel like I failed you on that one too.  I don’t think anything can compare to your inner strength (or was that just pure stubborness?)  and bulldog spirit.

While we didn’t get along in my growing up years and we had some really tough times, as we both grew up together, we found a peace and found a true mother/daughter relationship.  I am so grateful God gave us the last few years to grow together.

I know you are in a much better place and you are now perfectly whole and pain free.  You have found those grandbabies that have gone on before you and I know you are thrilled beyond words to be the first to hold my babies.  You always did like to be first

There has never been anyone like you and no one or nothing will ever take your place.

I love you momma and I miss you. 

Your Daughter

** for those of you who stuck through this and read it…it’s just a small portion of what I feel.  I truly had a hard time finding the words to write today.  As I signed this letter and looked for a picture to post, a song came on the radio that brought me to my knees.  I can’t find the lyrics written at this time, but when I do, I will post them.  The song is called Wish You Were Here by Mark Harris.  It was almost like it was heaven sent for me to hear at just that moment. **

A special thank you to my friend Barb, who along with her son listened to the song over and over to come up with the words of the song.

Wish You Were Here — Mark Harris 

I wanted to tell you 

How close I ‘ve kept 

The memories of you in my heart 

and all of the lifetimes 

We’ve had to share 

Live even though we’re apart 

But don’t cry for me  

‘Cause I’m finally free 

to run with the angels 

on streets made of gold 

to listen to stories 

of saints new and old 

to worship our maker 

that’s where I’ll be 

when you finally find me 

Now don’t you be weary 

’cause waiting for you 

are wonders that you’ve never known 

Just hold on to Jesus 

reach out for His hands 

and one day they’ll welcome you home 

and that’s when you’ll be free 

finally free… finally free 

to run with the angels 

on streets made of gold 

to listen to stories 

of saints new and old 

to worship our maker 

that’s where I’ll be 

when you finally find me 

I wish you were here (I wish you were here) 

I wish you were here (I wish you were here) 

and all of the dreams that you treasure 

will soon come together 

and that’s when your sorrow 

will find tomorrow and  

you will rise again 

to run with the angels 

on streets made of gold 

to listen to stories 

of saints new and old 

to worship our maker 

that’s where you’ll be 

when you finally find me 

we’ll run with the angels 

on streets made of gold 

we’ll listen to stories 

of saints new and old 

we’ll worship our maker 

that’s where we’ll be 

when you finally find me 

I wish you were here  

I wish you were here

I totally did not get done the things I wanted to on Saturday.  Never made it to the store for food, never did get that haircut, and didn’t start dyeing yarn until last night.  But we had a great weekend all the same.  Cass spent some of her grandpa birthday money and bought yarn, hair stuff, and is finally showing signs of turning into a “girly girl”. 

Chris bought some plastic canvas stuff and started on a project when we got home. Jess, wanted to be like her brother and sat watching him for quite awhile.  I was able to snap this picture showing her “pretending” she was sewing too.

I did start some yarn lastnight and picked up where I left off this morning.   I have a few special orders to get done and then want to play some more on some experimenting that I have been doing.  I think I finally got smart and went to the beauty supply place and got a huge smock.  I’ve ruined two shirts in the last two months by not paying attention to where I am painting, so…I have the cape.  It works great.

 Totally funny thing here….Monday at noon the tornado sirens go off for the weekly test.  I think I have instilled some panic in the children or they are taking the test seriously.  When the sirens went off a little bit ago, they jumped up and stated “SIRENS” and went through the house closing all the bedroom doors and sat in the hallway.  I looked out the window to see the kids in the schoolyard behind us just playing and going on with life like they hadn’t heard a thing.

1. Do you use a bag/sachel/wallet?

Bag and wallet.  My bag is a small backpack type bag and doubles as my small project bag as well.  This way I can always carry a pair of socks in progress with me.
2. Do you use the same bag/sachel/wallet everyday or change depending on your outfit?

With my life and family, who has time to change a bag everyday?  Nope, I stick with the same one.
3. What do you carry in your bag/sachel/wallet?

See above mentioned sock in progress knitting project as well as my wallet, check book, hand cream, a pen, lip balm, keys, cell phone, and sunglasses.
4. Do you check and change the contents of your bag/sachel/wallet before you go anywhere specific or do you take everything everywhere?

Take it all with me.  I do clean it out every now and then.
5. How often do you have a good clean out of your bag/sachel/wallet?

About every other day or so.  It’s a really smallish type bag therefore I can’t get too much extra stuff in there.

Ok…well, I somehow messed up my blog again…as of earlier today everything was bolded and I can’t figure it out. So..if someone can tell me how to get rid of the bold code that starts somewhere here please let me know. :)  ( edited to add….walk away for a few moments and then go back to it and within 2 seconds find the mistake….all is well now..thanks for playing Can You Find The Stray HTML Code That Bolds Everything.)

On the knitting front, here’s a picture of the diamond socks revisited.  I am just retesting the pattern before I send it off to my tester(s).  I started them in the Opal yarn that Kelly gifted me and while I liked the yarn, I just didn’t like how it was working up with this pattern.  You couldn’t really see the diamond, so I frogged and started over with this Knit Picks Palette Yarn. The color is aptly called green.  They are working up nicely and quickly too.  If you are interested in testing this pattern and don’t mind that I haven’t ever really written a sock pattern for others before let me know and I will be glad to help contribute to your insanity.  These are written for the toe up, one circ method.

On the doggie front, Caleb is doing well.  He’s off all his meds now and we notice he is limping a little bit, but that’s to be expected.  He’s getting along much better with the collar, but everytime we take it off, he dives for the paw and starts licking…so the collar remains on for the most part.  We do take it off and give him a break every now and then.  He gets the stitches out on the 31st so I am sure if all goes well he will get to lick all he wants.

Today I need to run some errands, do some grocery shopping, let Cass spend her birthday money from grandpa on yarn for her Project Spectrum mystery.  I am sure she will get some more drawing items as well…or something to do with horses.  Want to get a hair cut while we are out as well.  And then home to dye, dye, dye wool and yarn.  It’s shaping up to be a beautiful day so it will be perfect for dyeing.  Also, I want to flash my stash on April 1st.  So I need to do  a little more organizing out in my work area and then I will be ready to take some pictures to show off my stash.  I am sure it’s going to be totally pitiful compared to what some of you all have, but it could be a great reason to sock stock up on some more yarn and fiber goods.

Hope you all have a great day.

SUCCESS: 

Ladies and Gentlemen….we have a success story.  The cat has gotten into the bed!  Yes, he has slept in it all day.  Of course, in order to get said cat into the bed, I had to put it where he lays the most.  He likes to hang out in my rocker in the living room.  The other cats prefer to play hide and seek throughout the day and come out only when they want something.  Bear, however, sticks pretty close to us all day long.  Now this is the same cat that will eat off Jessi’s play tea set, the same cat that let’s the kids dress him up in play clothes, the same cat that will sit in a baby stroller, and the same cat that steals push pins from the walls, bites our toes at night, and likes to sleep in the kitchen cabinet (don’t worry…it’s not a cabinet that contains dishware)

STILL WAITING:

An update to the dreaded doctor appointment yesterday.  Well…long story short.  We are still in a holding pattern.  Even though I had plenty of documentation in my file to show indeed there is a problem, there wasn’t enough documentation showing the results of some of the tests that had been previously performed. So, am getting some more blood work done, one of which is a genetic test to see if I carry BRCA1/BRCA2 gene which could increase my chances of getting breast or ovrian cancer.  Because of the problems I have and with momma having breast cancer, the doctor wanted to run the test.  Normally it takes a lot to get approved for the test, because it is kind of expensive, but he was able to get it approved rather quickly.  Somehow, I think finding a 5cm cyst on my ovary had a hand it getting approved within moments of asking for it.  Ok, not that I am taking the cyst thing lightly.  Not at all.  Yesterday I was a nervous wreck.  I still have to go for an ultra sound 4-April and see what it reveals.  But since I have PCOS, cysts are sort of normal for me.  I guess I just expected (and half wanted) him to tell me yesterday that he was going to schedule me for surgery and it would be Monday and then all would be better and happy and life could go on and be nothing but rainbows and fibery treats.  But since that didn’t happen, I guess I will continue to plug away as I have been pretending that my insides don’t feel like they are going to fall out on some days.

 I totally forgot to give a shout out to Kiki and Vesper for the goodies I received on Monday.  Kiki sent me the cutest spinning wheel lamp.  It’s in Americana colors and matches my decor wonderfully.  And Vesper (oh girl how I miss ya and wish we were back in KY next door to each other again drinking tea at 3:00 in the morning…but I digress) sent me a river stone she found while out with the kids.  This stone is sooo smooth and shiny and almost perfectly forms a heart.  It’s a perfect “worry stone”.  Thank you both for making a potentially horrible week a one where I know I am loved by others outside my own family (and there are days I wonder about that ;)  )

So do you like the new layout?  Hubby told me that when he checked up on our life while at work he couldn’t get the 3 columns I had on the other layout to line up right and the third column ended up being below everything else.  I figured if he was having that trouble, others might have been too, so  plea for help went to Kiki and she hooked me up with this layout.  She’s so creative and does great graphic work.

Ok, I told you earlier in the week if the Sticky Chicken turned out to be a success I would post it here.  Well….it was an overwhelming success and oldest daughter that would prefer never to eat meat if we let her asked for thirds!  The house smelled so yummy all day long.  We couldn’t wait to dive into this dish at dinner time.

   2      Tablespoons   Oil
   1      Tablespoon    Soy Sauce
   3      Tablespoons   Smooth Peanut Butter
   3      Tablespoons   Ketchup

   4-8 pieces of chicken (any pieces will do… wings, thighs, drumsticks, bone-in, skin-on, boneless,skinless, maybe even whole chicken)

Place chicken into crockpot (frozen is fine) Mix first 4 ingredients and pour over chicken.  It won’t pour easy.  I just sort of “dumped” it on the chicken.  Cook on high for 3 to 4 hours, then turn to low for the remaining cooking time.  The peanut butter mixture will start to breakdown and become more of a sauce consistency.  Serve when chicken is fully cooked.

** edited to add….hubby didn’t like the other lay out so I switched back…for now **

Today’s the big day for the surgical consult.  I had to go through my medical file and note all the times I had been to the doc for the same problem so it would be easy for this new guy to find the problems I’ve had and tests that have been run, meds tried, etc.  In the 5 years we were stationed in KY, I have 30 different sticky’s for each time I went with the same problem.  Would you say that 30 times in 5 years is enough documentation that there’s a problem?  That doesn’t count the 2 years we were stationed in KS.  All documention was in a part of the file by itself and needed no sticky’s.  WOW!  Ok…I am still fearful of what they will say, but I think on average 5 times a year to the doc for the same icky problems is enough for me…what do you all think?

Doggie continues to get better.  Vet called yesterday with biospy results of the removed toe.  He had a malignant tumor as well as the deformed paw!  She was quite surprised at the results, because this type of tumor generally shows up in older dogs but because of the reoccuring infections, malignant cells started to grow.  Now, their course of action said to remove the digit and nothing else was needed.  It was low grade and hadn’t spread.  That pus that was coming out, was actually the tumor that ruptured (ooh gross).  So…I am glad we took the course of action we did.  Vet says he will be fine and has many years ahead of him.  I’m glad.

Cassidy decided that she wanted to take part in Project Spectrum, and used some of my handspun to make wrist warmers, a neck warmer, and the headband yesterday.  She crocheted them with no pattern, just playing around.  Used every scrap and enjoyed showing them off.  She’s already planning her project for next months colors so she’s a step ahead of me.  She’s coming along with knitting as well.  She’s slower at it, and is easily frustrated, but I reminded her that she did the same thing with crochet when she started.

I finished the kitty pi bed and it’s all dry.  Would you believe the cats won’t have anything to do with it?  Seriously…I have actually put two of them in there, and they sit for a moment then jump right back out.  Perhaps if I just leave it on the floor, eventually they will get the idea it’s for them.  Of course they are doing this because I MADE this for them to be a nice mommy.  I know for a fact if I throw a piece of paper on the floor, they will fight each other to see who gets to lay on it.  Cats….go figure.

It snowed last night!  SNOW! I couldn’t believe it.  What weird weather.  Just weird!

:: New Car Smell ::

Onesome- New: What’s new in your life? New car, new house, new job or new person, or even just a new toy you bought for yourself?  Ummm…what’s new?  Yarn.  Yup…yarn.  Always yarn!

Twosome- Car: What kind of car do you drive? What kind of car would you like to drive if you could? 2005 Suburban appropriately enough in a color called Cashmere.  I mean what fibery possessed person would I be without a color called Cashmere.  Just saying that word brings a calmness to mind, doesn’t it?  What car would I drive if I could.  Well….I guess it would be what I am driving now.  I love my “Beauty”.  Yup…she has a name.  Jac actually named her when we were first looking.  As we drove off the lot he turned around and waved and said, “bye Beauty.”

Threesome- Scent: Scents are great at bringing back memories. Is there a scent that any time you smell it you flash back to something in your past? Most certainly the scent of Shalimar.  It was my momma’s favorite perfume.  When I smell it I think of her.  I have her last bottle of perfume wrapped in plastic wrap just so the smell never goes away.  Although daddy bought me some of my own last Christmas, it just isn’t the same, ya know?

There are days when it just seems impossible to come up with a good title for the day.  So today shall be an “umm” day.

I finished knitting the kitty pi bed last night and will throw it in the washer in just a bit.  Will post pictures when it’s done.  Not sure what I will cast on next, but it’s looking like the Fiber Trends Sheep Tote pattern. I am going to do this because that’s what Kelly is doing and I want to be just like her. :)  Seriously though, I attempted to do this tote one other time, but there was so much going on with my momma at the time that I couldn’t concentrate, ripped it out and never looked at the pattern again.  So, start it again, and see what comes of it.  Also need to start another “portable” sock project since I finished the Diamond Socks.  (by the way…keep in mind a great name for the socks because there just might be a sock naming contest in our future.)

Tonight I am making a crock pot recipe called Sticky Chicken.  It’s new to us and includes chicken, peanut butter, and a few other things.  I was a little hesitant to do it, but I tell ya, it’s smelling really good right now.  If it turns out well, I will post the recipe on Friday.

I’m off to shrink a kitty bed.  Catch ya all later.

10 Things You Worry About

1. Will my children ever recover from the trauma of their past.
2. Will I ever have a baby to love and nurture.
3. What we will do after the Army? (where will we leave, what will we do, etc)
4. The direction our country is headed.
5. Am I a good mom?
6. Am I a supportive and loving wife?
7. Do I consistantly portray God in my actions?
8. Will my husband get deployed?
9. Will I see my daddy again?
10. Will I get over the loss of my momma?

Wow….had a somewhat relaxing weekend with the family and now have much to catch up on.

First…the rain.  We received a bunch of rain and the back yard turned into a small lake yesterday.  But it’s already soaking up and the grass is starting to sprout and the trees are budding.

I worked in my work area yesterday and really got it organized.  I ended up making these 4 rovings which are for sale on my ETSY shop.

Diamond Socks are completed.  Now to finish writing the pattern and send to my tester.  Hope you can see the large diamonds running up the top of the foot and the smaller diamonds that circle the cuff.  I will try to get better pictures when the weather is less gloomy.

Then there’s doggie.  Well…Caleb is doing well.  He did manage to get out of his collar on Saturday when we left him at home alone while we were out running around in the rain and pulled a stitch out, but it appears no damage was done.  He’s getting along much better with the collar on, but still runs into everything.  He refuses to sleep anywhere but by mom and dad so he sleeps in between hubby and I at night.  I woke yesterday morning to find my own head inside his collar when he was sleeping on my pillow!

I shall leave you with a pic of oldest daughter.  When hubby got his new ACUs he got rid of his older uniforms.  He decided to donate some of them to the kids dress up pile and this is what walked into the room yesterday.  Hubby says sign her up.  I think the miltary would be good for her